Saturday August 1, 2015
We are still fasting and praying and God is still reminding us of things he has already said. Haha! I told Aaron my thoughts about going back to what God originally said and how I have refocused after being reminded of it again and again. He thought for awhile and said one of the first things God told him since being here was to wake up sleeping giants. A sleeping giant is a Christian that has fallen into the routine of religion and is not living the passion and purpose for which God has created them.
We are still being reminded over and over about the necessity of prayer and the power it has. We can know it is true, but we do not understand how to get to that place of power. We are going to continue praying, the way we know how, and ask God to show us where we need to go from there.
Sunday August 2, 2015
We went to Grace Center this morning for the first time (minus the one Sunday Aaron and I were back), since school got out at the beginning of summer. I have to use the good ol’ church cliche and say that the message was totally for us, because it was. Pastor Jeff had a message prepared and felt like he was not supposed to give it, so he had a man come up to share about a healing he had received while Pastor Jeff waited to see what direction God was wanting to go. He ended up talking about recognizing the seasons in your life. If it looks like nothing is happening in your life, if it feels like you are not doing anything, do not despair. You very well could be in a season of perseverance and in this time your roots are growing deep so that you will be strong enough to go through all the things God has planned for you. He then talked about hope deferred makes the heart sick and we can hold on to disappointment and make ourselves lose focus on Jesus Christ, our source of hope. He quoted Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” he kept repeating that we have a future and a hope, a future and a hope, a future and a hope, etc. He also used a verse in Joel that had encouraged me in one of my moments of great discouragement. Joel 2:19 The Lord will reply, “Look! I am sending you grain and new wine and olive oil, enough to satisfy your needs. You will no longer be an object of mockery among the surrounding nations.” At the end of the message Pastor asked those who would like prayer for keeping hope alive to come forward. Isabella was in Sunday school so it was Aaron and I and the boys that went forward. A man came up to us that we have never met and started praying for us. He told Aaron the word he kept hearing for our family was “restoration”. He also said he kept seeing a scene from the old west when they would all begin to circle their wagons. He said that we are circling our wagons and that help is coming.
I am not sure I am satisfied with those answers. Aaron broke his fast after church saying that God undeniably spoke to us, that He knows where we are, and that we should continue to persevere. He reminded me of our conversation months ago about clay pots and if they are taken out of the fire too early they will not be strong enough for what they were made to do. all that is true, but I am still not sure I am satisfied. Hannah did not even have a promise from God, but she petitioned him for what she wanted most. Jacob did not have a specific promise of protection from Esau, but that was one of the reasons he was up all night wrestling with an angel.
We began a 40 day prayer devotional with the kiddos. We talked about the importance of asking, seeking, and knocking and never giving up. We talked about God giving us promises and that he would not give promises that he did not intend to keep. Aaron said that we would keep on knocking and pounding on heavens doors until our hands fall off. Max chimed in and said, “And then we’ll pound on the door with our heads!”
Wednesday August 5, 2015
We have had a few horrible nights of sleeping in the van. We made our own air conditioner out of a Styrofoam cooler filled with ice and a fan so that we would not have to keep starting the van to cool down. Good thought, but it is so humid that it does not keep up so we have to start the van anyway. We woke up disgustingly sweaty and smelly. Aaron said he was thankful for the words that we received and the reminder of our direction, but after a horribly hot night Sunday night he woke up Monday morning and said, “This is not ok. I am going to fast again. We need a house.” Haha!
Monday August 10, 2015
Still no “great revelation”, but I have noticed in different Bible verses, devotionals and book readings, the importance of praying with focus and a specific intention. It was another thing we knew, but never really put into practice. We wrote down the things we are specifically praying for at this time: Purpose and direction, a house and more than enough. I know I need to be writing so I need to commit myself to that. Aaron was told to wake sleeping giants, but we do not really know what that looks like. How does he do that? We often feel completely clueless about God now. It is probably a good thing! Maybe it means that we have been unlearning the things that were partial truths, or not truth at all, and now God can begin to show us who he is, how to hear him and how to talk with him.
Friday August 14, 2015
I need to be better about writing down when the kiddos say things about their faith or the things our journey has been teaching them. I guess because we have conversations all the time, I do not really think about it much. We had shared with some friends a conversation we had with Jack. Jack was talking about getting a car and taking care of it and then he said, “But, I always need to remember that God wants to use what I have to help others. So I might be sitting at the lunch table and God will say, ‘You need to give your car to that kid.’ and I will need to be willing to do that. I’d probably go drive it around the neighborhood first though.” Our friends were so impressed that he would realize that on his own and that it was not a conversation mom and dad were having that he just agreed with. That is when my friend mentioned I need to be writing this stuff down.
I started and posted the intro blog for the new series we are going to do. We are calling it the Unabridged Series. We are completely opening up about everything, the good, the bad and the ugly. We feel like this is an important piece to us being able to take the next step in our journey and also to help people understand where our God thoughts are coming from. I pray that God will use it to speak into someone’s life.
Saturday August 15, 2015
It is a good thing that, most of the time, Aaron and I have our bad days on different days. Ha! Today is Aaron’s day. He was saying how tired he is of everything before it was even 10am. Not a good sign! I fell like it is a good day so I will deflect his grumpies from the kiddos. He does that for me more often than I want to admit!
I have discovered that when I am tired my brain cannot focus on prayer at all!! I was trying to pray the other night and I would stay focused for a few moments and all of a sudden I would be thinking about Bella’s hair or cowboys or shoes or any other weird random thing! I do not really remember exactly what they were, but they were weird like that. The same thing happened again this morning. I will be sooo happy when we get a house where I can grab a cup of coffee in the morning and head to my study where I can listen to music and pray and meditate until I can focus. That will be so awesome!!! Soon, Lord, soon!!! I have been doing my best to try to have focused prayer where I am, but we are rarely in a place where I can really do that. The only place I am all by myself is in the shower and even then it is the rec center showers so there are all kinds of people in the bathroom or in the other showers next to mine.
Sunday August 16, 2015
For two of the last three Sundays Pastor Jeff has gotten up to speak and said that the message he had prepared was not what God was wanting to say that morning. Both times what he did end up talking about were exactly what we needed to hear. Today he talked about the children of Israel complaining and how that led to forty years of wandering and the older generation not being able to enter the promise land. Their complaints were legitimate; no food, no water, etc. but it was the condition of their hearts that showed lack of trust and faith. I had had a conversation with Alex and Jack after I picked them up from school on Thursday about the need for me to be done complaining and being negative. If I feel like I am going to say something snarky or negative I will quickly follow it up with, “No, this could be the very day God does something! He could do something at any moment!”
Jack came with me to the food pantry this morning. On our way over there he asked why we never tell people we live in our van when they ask where we live. I told him that we have told a few people that we live in a “motor home”. He said, “Yeah, but it’s not a motor home. It’s a van.” We walked in the door of the food pantry and almost as soon as I set our box down, the sweet lady that helps run the pantry came over and asked where in Spring Hill we live. We had seen her and her husband a couple of times at a local park and grocery store. I tried to avoid answering the question by saying that we used to live off Buckner Road road, but then she asked if that was where we still lived. I guess God was using Jack to prepare me for this moment. Ha! I told her that we are now living in our van. She immediately started thinking of all the different food in the pantry that would be non perishable and prepared on the go. She told us that we could take extras of certain things since we are not able to use everything in there and she offered us the use of her freezer and refrigerator if we want to store milk or cheese or something since she does not live too far away from where the kiddos go to school. I told her we had just seen her husband at the grocery store a few days earlier and had discussed talked to them about helping out at the food pantry. We exchanged numbers and she said she would give us a call if they ever needed help.
Friday August 21, 2015
We have had a crazy week! The week that I decide to really focus on writing has become really busy. Isn’t that just the way of it?!
Aaron went to a job fair at the school on Tuesday night to talk to Williamson County Schools Transportation about bus driving. He said he wanted to go in there and feel it out. He had seen yet another post on social media about the great need for bus drivers and said that if it did not have the title of “job” attached to it he would have done it a long time ago. So, he needed to find out if this was indeed God giving him the go ahead to take this job. He had texted his bus driver friend on Monday saying he was going to go to the job fair and could he use him as a reference. Our friend called back immediately and said, “Your ears must have been ringing! I was just talking to those guys and mentioned your name and said you would be great for the job!” He also gave Aaron the inside scoop on everything so when Aaron did go to the job fair he was only there for about 10 minutes because he already knew most of what they had to say. He called the transportation department after he filled out the online application and they set up an interview for Thursday afternoon. He went in for the interview and they basically told him the job was his if he wanted it. We talked about it some more and decided that if God wanted this to happen everything would work out and if not he put a halt to all of it. We have certainly seen him do that with other jobs! Ha! Here is Aaron’s post about the new job.
Tuesday August 25, 2015
Another full weekend! We were at our friends’ house helping them move things out and pack up the moving truck. Their house sold and they have a closing date so their move is very real now. We stayed at their house all weekend since there was so much to do. Bonus for us because we had a bathroom and shower so convenient! Yay! Before we left they gave all of us money for helping them move. The kiddos were so excited and more than likely they will spend it on food!! Haha!!!
Aaron heard from the bus garage again and he has an appointment for a physical tomorrow at 7:45am. Then he can go to the DOT and get his permit.
Wednesday August 26, 2015
I went out for coffee with my BFF while Aaron had his physical for the CDL licensing. We talked about all that God has done in her life and ours, since we have stepped out in faith for different situations. We discussed the importance of fasting so that we can be in a place to hear Him and that she was going to fast before she attended a writer’s retreat, so that her spirit would be in the right place. I had been feeling like I needed to fast again, so I told her I would fast and pray with her.
When I opened the devotion to do that night with the family it was about fasting. It talked about the supernatural power when fasting and prayer is combined. Then it challenged the reader to ask God when they should fast and what they should be fasting about. As I was reading I thought to myself, “I should fast on Mondays and Tuesdays.” When I finished reading the kiddos were quiet for a moment, then Jack piped up and said, “I think you should fast two days a week.” This is one of many reasons I love having the kiddos involved in all parts of our journey. They are learning to walk in faith at the same time we are and things that we have been thinking and praying about, individually, get confirmed by someone else.